The bible speaks a lot about family issues and is rich in information regarding godly family living. For the sake of simplicity this page has been organized into the following categories in this order:

Marriage & Divorce
The Husband & Wife Relationship
Parental Responsibilites
Children
Polygamy

And please remember: Always test the teachings.

MARRIAGE AND DIVORCE

MARRIAGE: It is not a sin to marry (1 Corinthians 7:2, 8-9, 25-28, 36). Those who forbid marriage have fallen away from the faith (1 Timothy 4:1-3). According to the bible, a marriage is to be between a man and a woman. Marriage is an arrangement originated by God, as the man and the woman are each one half of the "whole" (Genesis 2:18, 21-24). God decreed that marriage be a permanent, unbroken bond between the husband and wife (Genesis 2:24) until one of them dies (Romans 7:2-3, 1 Corinthians 7:39). Marriage is to be legally recognized because it is to be honorable among all men. Lack of legal recognition makes it dishonorable, thus "common law" marriage is invalid in God's eyes (Hebrews 13:4). God considers engagement to be a serious promise of marriage. This is supported in that when Joseph decided to break off his engagement to Mary, he had to go through a divorce procedure, although they weren't actually married yet (Matthew 1:18-19). A husband or a wife is not to be depriving the other of marital benefits for lengths of time without mutual consent (1 Corinthians 7:3-5). Of course, a man is supposed to love his wife (Ephesians 5:33), so he wouldn't coerce his wife into it if she were sick, injured, or otherwise simply not in the mood. And since the wife is to have deep respect for her husband, (Ephesians 5:33) neither would she.

DIVORCE: Divorce is permitted only when one spouse has cheated on the other and no other time (Matthew 5:32, Matthew 19:3-10). Some argue this isn't really the case, stating that the culture of those times considered a betrothed couple as virtually married and thus the "divorce clause" could only be valid during engagement, (since they weren't quite married/one flesh yet) and therefore a truly married couple could not divorce even in instances of adultery. They cite the occasion at Matthew 1:18-19, in which Joseph thought to divorce Mary during their betrothal, as an example of this teaching. However, if you look at Christ's words spoken at Matthew 5:32 and 19:9, you'll see he states that everyone divorcing unless for fornication would be an adulterer when remarrying. Yes - everyone - there are no exceptions stated in these scriptures. The statement of "everyone" would have to include both married and engaged spouses, there is no wiggle room here. Some will still argue that Christ specifies "fornication", not adultery, which would only mean engaged spouses, not married ones. This is a flawed teaching due to an error in translation. According to the interlinear bible at http://www.scripture4all.org , the word used in the original is actually "porneia", which is sexual activity with someone you are not married to. Since both fornication and adultery fall under the category of "porneia", Christ included both levels of marriage (betrothal and marriage).

In a spritually mixed marriage (a Christian married to a non-Christian), if the non-believer leaves the believer, let that one depart, the believer is no longer in servitude (1 Corinthians 7:15). However, this isn't a license to divorce, for still the scriptures say that the only acceptable divorce is one due to "porneia", as stated above. To divorce and remarry under any other circumstance is a sin (Matthew 5:32, Mark 10:11-12, Romans 7:2-3). One night stands outside of one's marriage is adultery because it makes you "one" with the person you were with, thereby breaking the bond of matrimony (1 Corinthians 6:16). God considers fornication and adultery to be sins evil enough to keep us out of His Kingdom (1 Corinthians 6:9-10, Hebrews 13:4, James 4:4). What about the certificate of divorce Moses told the Israelites to give to the wives they no longer wanted? (Deuteronomy 24:1-3) Realize, it was Moses who gave this certificate, not God, as indicated at Matthew 19:7-9. Therefore, we still need to live according to God's original plan. God's plan overrides man's every time (Acts 5:29).

Now, we realize that for some of you it will be difficult to accept the idea that marriage is for life when there are other major issues that don't involve adultery. Yes, it is difficult to deal with an alcoholic, an addict, an abusive spouse, or even one that is just plain lazy or refuses to work when you need it. Or maybe there isn't anything particularly wrong, you've just fallen out of love. Unfortunately, the rules apply across the board, for the bible gives no other indication. However, the bible does mention the possibility of marital separation instead of divorce. But of course, in cases of separation, it is with the view of working towards reconciling with each other (1 Corinthians 7:10-11). This can work if both spouses are willing to work together for reconcilliation. However, in many cases only one spouse is willing. If that is your situation, though you are separated, you are still not free to divorce and remarry unless one spouse commits adultery against the other (Romans 7:2-3, Luke 16:18). Even though separated, you are still very married in God's eyes. This is a very difficult situation for many people, and there is no easy fix to it. This is where much prayer and reliance on God comes in to help you through it. He does see your situation, He will not abandon you (1 Corinthians 10:13, Hebrews 13:4-6).

HUSBAND AND WIFE RELATIONSHIP

The husband is the head of his wife (1 Corinthians 11:3, Ephesians 5:23). He is to respect his wife and treat her with honor (Ephesians 5:25,28-33, Colossians 3:18-19, 1 Peter 3:7). This may be difficult if she is a drunk, an addict, or an otherwise difficult person to deal with, but these don't absolve him from treating her respectfully. A man is to rejoice in the wife he chose and not chase after other women (Proverbs 5:15-23). Those who reach out for certain positions over the congregation must have monogamous marriages (1 Timothy 3:2, Titus 1:6). Husbands are supposed to be the spiritual heads of their families (1 Corinthians 14:35, Ephesians 6:4).

Wives were given a strong need for their husbands (Genesis 3:16). The wife is in subjection to her husband, even in the face of religious differences (Romans 7:2, 1 Corinthians 11:3, Ephesians 5:22,24, Colossians 3:18, 1 Peter 3:1). She is to have deep respect for him (Ephesians 5:33). Women are to love their husbands and subject themselves to them (Titus 2:4-5). This may be difficult if he is a drunk or addict or otherwise difficult person to deal with, but this doesn't absolve her from being respectful towards him. A capable wife is a crown to her husband (Proverbs 12:4). Although wives are in subjection to their husbands, it is fine for them to run their own business venture and own land (Proverbs 31:10,14,16,18,24). Although husbands are the spiritual head of the family, the wives can also take part in the spirituality of the household as well as others (2 Timothy 1:5, Romans 18:1,26).

PARENTAL RESPONSIBILITIES

Fathers are to provide for their families' spiritual needs (Ephesians 6:4). This does not specify just married fathers, therefore it goes for all fathers. Mothers also participate in the spiritual health of the home (1 Timothy 5:4, 2 Timothy 1:5). Fathers aren't supposed to be so severe so that the children feel exasperated (Ephesians 6:4, Colossians 3:21). Mothers are to love their children (Titus 2:4). Both parents are to provide for their families to the best of their abilities (2 Corinthians 12:14, 1 Timothy 5:8).

CHILDREN

Children are to be obedient to their parents (Proverbs 1:8, Proverbs 6:20, Ephesians 6:1, Colossians 3:20). This isn't shown to be limited to only married parents or those who have the custody. Therefore, it indicates obedience to both parents, married or not, custodial or not. Children are to respect their parents (Ephesians 6:2). This can be difficult if the parents have loose morals, but this is no excuse for disrespect. The children of a spiritually mixed marriage (a Christian with a non-Christian) are still considered holy to God due to the believing parent's faith (1 Corinthians 7:14). Grown children are to help provide for their family's needs to the best of their ability (1 Timothy 5:4,8).

POLYGAMY

Polygamy is a very complicated issue, and takes some lengthy discussion. Polygamy is the state of being married to more than one person simultaneously. The word cell "poly" means multiple or many. There are two forms of polygamy: Polyandry, which is when a woman has more than one husband (think of the similarities between the words polyandry and husbandry ) and Polygyny, which is when a man has more than one wife (think of the similarities between the words polygyny and other female "-gyn" words such as gynecology ). In the bible, the prevalent form of polygamy was polygyny.
Men of stature were to have only one wife (Deuteronomy 17:17, 1 Timothy 3:2, 12, Titus 1:6). The bible strongly indicates that a man is to have one wife and a woman is to have one husband (1 Corinthians 7:2, 1 Timothy 5:9). The only times polygamy occurred in the bible was when the humans chose to take extra wives (Genesis 4:19, Genesis 29:18-29, 1 Samuel 1:2, 2 Chronicles 24:3), there is no indication that God advised this style of marriage. However, out of His great wisdom and love, He made sure to create laws to protect the additional wives and their children (Exodus 21:7-10, Leviticus 18:18, Deuteronomy 21:15-17). It is also worth noting the problems that came up due to the wives being jealous of each other (Genesis 16:1-6, Exodus 29:30-30:15, 1 Samuel 1:1-8) We must realize that rival situations will emerge in polygyny because women were given a strong need for their husband (Genesis 3:16), making it is unnatural for a woman to share a husband, and scripture makes it clear that God does not approve of unnatural situations (Leviticus 18:23, Leviticus 20:12, Romans 1:26-27, 1 Corinthians 6:9, Jude 7). As for polyandry, this too is against what God intended, because He made the man to be the head of the woman (1 Corinthians 11:3, Ephesians 5:23), and a woman can have only one headship. Otherwise there will be problems as to whom she should be obedient to if the husbands have differences in their headship. Therefore, multiple marriage is an institution that works against the scriptures. A man who truly loves his wife will not put her in that position, for a man is supposed to be good to his wife and treat her well (Ephesians 5:25,28-33, Colossians 3:19, 1 Peter 3:7). A godly woman would likewise be monogamous, for she is to respect her husband (Ephesians 5:33), which would include not pitting his headship against another's. The original plan from God only made room for monogamous marriages (Deuteronomy 17:17, 1 Corinthians 7:2, 1 Timothy 3:2,12, 1 Timothy 5:9, Titus 1:6).
Also, it will do us good to look into the scriptural concept of being "one flesh". According to the bible, when a man and woman marry, the man is to "stick to his wife" and become "one flesh" with her (Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5-6, Mark 10:7-8, Ephesians 5:31). Becoming "one flesh" is sexual intimacy a shown at 1 Corinthians 6:16. Now, Yahweh made only one woman for Adam to be his other half, and the two of them together were considered as a complete whole (Genesis 2:18-24). Since it takes only the two individuals together become "one flesh", this supports that each is a half of the whole and is complete together. This concept is reinforced in that it takes only one man and one woman to produce a family. Extra mates are unnecessary. What does this mean? That to become sexually intimate with someone causes you to be a complete unit with that person, as per the "one flesh" concept in 1 Corinthians 6:16. Thus, the "one flesh" bond you made with a spouse becomes broken when you become "one flesh" with your other spouse. More than two halves is too many, it doesn't work. You'd be constantly breaking and re-making the flesh bond among your spouses, whereas marriage is decreed to be a lifelong, unbroken bond (Genesis 2:24). Therefore, both forms of polygamy are wrong and are forms of fornication and adultery.
So now the question is: If Yahweh does not approve of polygamy, then why did He allow men in the bible to freely practice it? This is because we are in the midst of a major issue: Who has the right to universal sovereignty? What does this have to do with polygamy? It has to do with letting mankind prove whether or not we can successfully live under our own rules without God's interference. Because this is detailed elswhere on this site, please go to the page entitled "Bible Topics" at the first subheading to understand how this connects.

Now, because of this issue, He allows us to attempt our own rules so we can prove whether or not we can actually behave ourselves successfuly without His help. Part of this means He stays out of our main "business". Why? Because if God were to interfere with our business the issue wouldn't be proven that we could do it ourselves. By necessity He lets us go with our faulty wisdom in order to see whether or not we actually have what it takes. Thus if some cultures decide to practice polygamy, God allows it in order to show whether or not that piece of human "wisdom" is workable. Allowing it is not the same as approving of it. For example, if your adult son chooses to marry a woman with a questionable reputation, your allowing his choice is not the same as approving of the marriage. Thus, with an outlooked balanced with scriptures, we can see that polygamy, though tolerated in the bible, is not a godly form of family living. The bible shows examples of God allowing a situation even though He didn't actually approve of it. The Moses Divorce Certificate is one example (Mark 10:4 in reference to Deuteronomy 24:1-4)

So the question comes up: What if a person is already in a polygamous marriage? How does a newly Christian polygamous "fix" this situation? Since all the spouses in a polygamist marriage are essentially committing adultery/fornication, it is scriptural that all of them could dissolve their marriages from the one shared spouse. Another choice could be for the first one married to the polygamist to remain the spouse, while all the others are divorced. We say the first one, because in God's eyes that would be the spiritually "legal" marriage (since the extra spouses would simply be adulterous extras that came after the original wedding occurred). The bible has examples of godly men dismissing their "spiritually illegal" wives (Ezra 10:10-19). Of course, a moral person will assure that his/her children with the dismissed spouses are well cared for.

Of course, we haven't covered every sort of family situation there is on this page, for to do that would need an entire book! However, we hope we've covered a broad enough range of biblical guidance so that all of you can glean the answers you need here. And, as always, pray to God for guidance and search His Holy Word!